Ways Canada is like the U.S.         Ways Canada is NOT Like the U.S.
Lots of fat Caucasians                          Has health coverage for all citizens
Immigrants                                           Lots of Tim Horton outlets
Lots of square footage                         People friendly and polite
Lots of restaurants                              If you bump into someone, THEY
Has Wal-mart                                       will say, "excuse me."
Lots of discount stores/dollar 
stores                                                   Has "The Beer Store"
SUVs                                                     Calls the restroom the "washroom"
Speaks English (for the most              Has French as official language too
part)                                                      Queen Elizabeth on almost every damn unit of currency
Canadians drive over the speed            Low murder rate
limit
Has a lottery

Headlines I didn't see in Canada:

Canadian Soccer Riot Kills Thousands

Martin: We Should Have followed U.S. Into Iraq

'Screw the NHL!' Say Canadian Citizens; Nation Embraces Water Polo

Thousands Flock To Toronto In Search of Cheap Real Estate

Fed Up With 'Polite' Image, Canadians Refraining
From Saying "I'm Sorry" When Bumped Into

Tim Hortons Files For Bankruptcy

Universal Health Care 'Just Not Worth It' Say Majority of Citizens

Treasury Ponders Introducing $3, $4 and $5 Coins Into 
Circulation; 
Canadians Rejoice At
Prospect of "Threenies, Fournies and Fivenies"

Kevin Hearn Busted For Cocaine






Does your mom know you're reading this at HOME?